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  1. Calvin Harris? Only one I can think of and he looks like he could be a real pr%ck!
    My response? Anybody in the retail or hospitality business will tell you that you just have to suck it up, be empathic, and smile. We have to have our own acting skills, too. What we really want to say or do is quite different though.

  2. for those who don’t know…… carpaccio is an hors d’oeuvre consisting of thin slices of raw beef or fish served with a sauce.

    the chef must have been fuming

    • Thanks. That was a really kind way to help explain what this was about. I had no idea.

  4. “Sir, that is what Carpaccio is, raw meat. Would you like something else instead of this?”

  7. Don’t know any London DJs, and as a waiter my only response would be “Of course, sir.” But in my head I’m thinking, DON’T ORDER SOMETHING WHEN YOU CLEARLY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT IS!

  10. Calvin *.

    My response, as his waiter: “Would you prefer it on your head, sir?” accompanied by a sickly sweet smile. (And this is why I’d never make it in the hospitality business. God bless all of you who are in it and must deal with other human beings.)

  11. DJ: Calvin Harris

    Optional: I’d gladly take the food back, then I’d inform the Chef and owner of this contremps. Then I’d grab a good seat at the bar and watch the fireworks, knowing the owner and Chef would kick his sorry as* out.

  14. Calvin Harris, while Scottish, could be based out of London though my guess is Professor Green. His ex is Millie MacIntosh of Made In Chelsea fame and Quality Street inheritance. After their break-up, she always seemed to insinuate she was slumming when she was with him.