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Ghostly Illiterate Singer

ghost singing[Blind Gossip] This singer is writing a screenplay. So she says. Only… she’s not.

The truth is that [she] is functionally illiterate. I don’t think that people realize that about her. She didn’t graduate from high school, not because she was busy, but because she can’t read or write beyond a second-grade level.

When I receive emails or texts from her, it’s like they were written by a child whose native language is not English. It’s just a jumble of words, some bigger than others (as if she is trying to sound intelligent). She does not understand the concepts of grammar or spelling or sentence structure. I sometimes have to ask other people to read the messages and then we piece together what she is trying to say!

The thought of her writing a screenplay is laughable. I have never even seen her read a book (although she will pose with one for a photo shoot if required). Never. Not even to [her child/ren].

What she is going to do is lay out the broad strokes of the story and let a ghostwriter handle it. Of course she’ll take all the credit though! She wants that Oscar!!! That’s why she is going to name herself the writer/ producer/ star/ composer/ everything on this project.

Similar: Producers Outsmart A Lying Actress

Singer:

[Optional] Do you think that this project is going to earn her an Oscar?

Reader Interactions

Comments

  4. Gingerred says

    Beyonce!!!!! Has to be! Although she has a heavily curated image to make one think otherwise, she is dumb as dirt.

  6. Transitioning9 says

    Beyonce, it is quite obvious by the way she speaks. But there are several more out there. This just so happens to be about her this time.

  7. Stubbs says

    Beyonce- and good luck on the whole Oscar thing. I’m sure she is shooting for Elephant man – but (and I mean a big butt)- it will never get financing.

  9. jonesing says

    Don’t know why Mariah Carey popped into my head. Whoever it is should have hired tutors years ago. Being illiterate is like being handcuffed. Why live like that when you have money=options?
    As for Oscar material? Well if the story is compelling enough and the ghost writer is good enough-who knows?

  15. iheartkoko says

    Singer: Beyonce

    [Optional] Do you think that this project is going to earn her an Oscar? Hahahahaha! I’d like to see her try.

  19. VeronicaMarsBars says

    I initially thought this could be Britney Spears but then that last comment about wanting that Oscar indicates to me that this is Beyonce. I couldn’t be bothered to google search beyond the first page of results. They showed that it is inconclusive about whether she never finished or has a GED or high school diploma.

  22. rayodeplata says

    Singer: Cyndi Lauper

    I hope she doesn’t get any attention if it’s not really her personal work.

  27. Atlasmom says

    Mariah Carey– Oscar, probably not, although sometimes I do not understand how they decide who gets one!

  29. caela94 says

    Beyonce’
    She pretends to co write every lyric she sings.
    “she interprets lyrics”
    If that is the case Sinatra should have been a co writer on every tune he sang.

  38. EastlakeGirl says

    This is most definitely Beyonce. Someone told me about this just yesterday and my first thought was, “Yeah, right. Like SHE’S going to write it”. LOL

  41. Miss Marple says

    Smells like Queen Bey. If she pulls it all together then is deserved of something I guess!? Isn’t the entire industry just a simple case of ‘smoke and mirrors’ so what’s the difference between her taking the credit… like I’m sure others before her have done. Plus, this queen is renowned for taking the cred

  45. bhakti says

    I immediately thought Katy Perry but she doesn’t have kids so idk. If it were a man I’d guess Kanye. I got nothin’

  53. Okayeah says

    Beyonce? She’s reportedly not very smart.

    And no, probably not, unless she gets something good on all the Academy voters.

  56. marysunshine says

    Singer: Madonna

    With the screeplay The Impossible Lives of Greta Wells.

    I must admit that I’m kind of surprised.

    • mojomarlin says

      Madonna attended the University of Michigan on scholarship. You can’t get into that school without being REALLY smart. She is not illiterate.

  57. samsimons says

    Beyonce….good god, I knew she wouldn’t be doing it herself but didn’t realise she’s illiterate…that’s quite shocking actually

  63. mamasaid says

    Maybe Fantasia? I hate to even suggest it as I’m a big fan and she’s had a rough life….or JHud? Can’t be Mariah……

  67. Californialove says

    Beyonce. Carrying Blue Ivy is a more believable story than writing a screenplay. Ask her to say or spell ” effortlessly”

  73. FiyahHotFlashy says

    Beyonce
    I wonder if this project will get made because many folks are very vocal about her NOT getting involved on any level. I feel its inappropriate for her as a feature film. If she were to do a documentary maybe I’ll give her a pass

  84. WaitLemmeGuess says

    Beyonce. You can tell how coached she is when she’s interviewed. I don’t think she can actually create any of own thoughts. She’s that dumb.

    • PinkCrayon says

      B/w she’s trying to write and star in a movie about Saartjie Baartman, a woman “from the ‘bushmen’ tribe, who was forced to star in a London freak show 200 years ago, due to her extraordinarily large buttocks and ‘exotic features’.”

    • Moonpie says

      Her buttocks was actually kept in a museum for display. Later some folks tried to close down the display and give body parts a proper burial. Sad. I don’t wha became of all that.

  92. Manda.Lea says

    Beyonce
    No. This will not win her an Oscar. I believe the quote was “She lacks the basic human dignity for the project”.

  93. Taunnie says

    I’m going to guess Beyonce, who was awful bitter and sour grapes after Jennifer Hudson’s Oscar win for Dream Girls, and quite honestly when you hear her talk in interviews (which is rare, and for good reason I realize) you can sense her inarticulateness (but 2nd grade level?? Come on!). I suppose her wealth and fame make her exempt from having basic language skills like the peons of the world, lol.

    • kspeedian says

      Lol I thought the same thing about “second grade level”. That is TRULY illiterate if true. So why, with all her money & connections, doesn’t she just get a great tutor for herself? She could even have them sign a nondisclosure agreement! Seriously, only she would think herself “above” needing to know how to read & write lol. Too conceited for literacy; that’s a new one. If it were anyone else, I’d feel sorry for them, but, in her case, she has the means, etc, so I definitely do NOT.

    • kspeedian says

      I just realized that the only person I sorta feel bad for would be the ghost writer. I’m sure they’d be paid very well, hence the “sorta,” but I just mean if it ended up being really good and she DID get a lot of acclaim and/or awards for it, to have to carry on knowing it’s YOUR work, not being able to say or do anything to let people know that, would definitely be tough. Plus, since their name wouldn’t be on it, it wouldn’t further their career at all, no matter how amazing it were.

    • KWDragon says

      Professional writer here –
      Ghost writing is its own specialty. They usually make pretty good money and know they are trading in the “fame” for a paycheck. Also, while “the world” may not know them, others in the industry do. If the project is successful, she will get other lucrative ghost writing gigs.

      I know the idea of being a ghost writer may seem strange, but it is not much different from being a copy writer or an ad writer or even a song writer. I actually think it is pretty…

    • richiegaye says

      If you are jealous of J Hud you are in trouble she is awful
      Beyonce never had much to offer despite the sizzle

    • meemo506 says

      Second grade level is pretty common and you’d be surprised how few people surpass it. I work as a paraprofessional in a middle school. Almost all the 6th graders in the low reading class are at a 2nd grade level. Many don’t have families that push them or care, and they never get much higher, even with dedicated teachers. And honestly, talking to them, they sound pretty normal. You wouldn’t know unless you asked them to read or talk about complicated issues. I mean, how many people do you…

  96. Captain Fatnutz says

    Singer: Beyonce

    Do you think that this project is going to earn her an Oscar? Hell to the NO

    • zappy2050 says

      Definitely Beyonce.

      It is painful to watch her being interviewed. I can’t understand why she doesn’t hire a private tutor to at least teach her the basics. Maybe she is too embarrassed by her illiteracy. Sad.