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There’s No Crying In Fauxmance

tom hanks league of their own[Blind Gossip] What a mess!

This fauxmance was supposed to be easy. Everybody signed the contract and was supposed to play their part, with him footing the bill and getting PR for the both of them, and her playing the sweet, happy girlfriend. Easy.

This summer was supposed to be fun. Traveling together, sightseeing, beach vacations, ice cream, athletic events. Fun! All “subtly” photographed, of course.

Well, it’s not so fun and easy right now. She’s gone and made him look bad!

As the Tom Hanks character Jimmy Dugan would say, “There’s no crying in fauxmance! THERE IS NO CRYING IN FAUXMANCE!”

Now our actor is stuck. She just blew her second chance with him, but if he breaks up with her right now, HE looks like the bad guy who made his girlfriend cry! If he doesn’t break up with her, he’s stuck with someone who has made him look bad. He and his team are NOT happy today.

Expect some highly-publicized romantic gestures in the short-term to take the heat off of him, and then for things to be kept very happy and light through the end of the summer. He needs to get some distance from Crygate before deciding on his next move!

Similar: Five Times In Ten Years

Actor:

Girlfriend:

[Optional] If you were him, how much longer would you keep her around?

Reader Interactions

Comments

  8. mcwitch says

    B Coop and the professional escort Iryna (sp?) He just needs to come out already or quit these fake romances… his sexuality is the worse kept secret in Hollywood

  9. TeaDrinker says

    Irina Shayk and Bradley Cooper.

    He made her cry at Wimbeldon but they made up later.

  13. jojo5282 says

    Actor: Bradley Cooper and his gf got into a fight at Wimbledon.

    Two months… Tops. Then be with someone who makes you genuinely happy and isn’t bound by contract.

  14. haley1020 says

    Tom hiddleston & Taylor swift lol
    I don’t feel sorry for tom at all, he’s the one who wanted publicity and the bond role from this ridiculous fauxlationship lol

  17. ChezKK says

    Hiddleswift. But why bother? Shes already famous and he is up and coming.

    Its a waste of trash magazine space.

  18. silimom says

    Irina Shayk
    Bradley Cooper

    They’ll stick it out another month or two and then break up.

  25. bostonbratt says

    Lol! actor B Coop.
    Gfriend Irina Whatever.

    He seems mentally ill. I saw his intense stare at her. I don’t know, something is off with them. Usually mentally ill people are alcoholics or recovering alcoholics .
    He should break up with her now and then explain things weren’t going well and that was one of the bad moments

  27. sublimeLime says

    Bradley Cooper
    His model “girlfriend’ Irina Shayk

    Maybe two more weeks…

  30. Jester says

    This has to be Bradley Cooper and Irina Shayk! Saw that she was crying at Wimbledon this weekend, which makes me wonder if this is the blind from last week that stated one half of a couple didn’t want to attend?

    If I were him, due to the contract, I would play ‘nice’ and end it in a month or two. Sure his PR team can think of something in this time to make him appear the good guy.

  31. I Am PunkA says

    BRadley Cooper
    Irina Shayk

    Not gonna lie, I have enjoyed Cooper’s movies. But this PR stuff makes him look like a raging *. He comes across just mean spirited. Dude needs to chill out.

  34. little sherlock says

    The actor is Bradley Cooper.
    His girlfriend is Irina Shayk. She previously bearded Cristiano Ronaldo.

  37. ashanean says

    Actor Tom Hiddleston
    Girlfriend Taylor swift
    He thought he would be different
    He will dump heron a couple of weeks

  38. MaggiePKC says

    Bradley Cooper and Irina Shayk. There were pictures of her crying at Wimbledon.

  40. stolidog says

    Bradley Cooper and Irina Shayk. Really, one public fight makes everyone look bad and the contracts get torn up? Is everyone 5? If I were drafting the contracts, they would call for one public breakdown every 2-3 months. It’s supposed to be pretend reality, not a movie.

  41. sassygurl1987 says

    Actor: Bradley Cooper
    Girlfriend: Irina Shayk

    She was cold and unhappy during Wimbledon Finals! He’ll keep her until the end of summer.

  51. annabelle77 says

    Bradley Cooper and his beard Irina. She was crying at the tennis match. Sorry, but I would come out of the closet if I were him. This seems like s huge amount of manipulation and staging to me. It’s exhausting.

  52. kit e kat says

    Who else but Bradley and Irina, the professional beardette?
    Oh Brad, please do us all a favor and just come out already!

  56. draconius25 says

    Bradley Cooper
    Irina Shyak
    Till fall, not quite Christmas not quite New Years

  61. AllisonArgent says

    Actor: Bradley Cooper

    Girlfriend: Irina Shayk

    Optional: No, I probably wouldn’t. But I probably wouldn’t have a fauxmance in the first place, so you get what you pay for.

  62. Ramalama says

    Bradley Cooper

    Irina Shayk was NOT a happy camper at Wimbledon recently lol

    He’s probably be on the lookout for a replacement, just give it time.

  68. kvetro60 says

    Bradley Cooper and his latest beard he made cry at Wimbleton. Come out already Coop, we don’t care.

  69. mgilsonglass says

    Actor: Bradley Cooper

    Girlfriend: Irena Sheraapewoipngdg…

    [Optional] If you were him, how much longer would you keep her around?

    They are adults! they are pretending it is real, why can’t they release a statement saying it didn’t work out… lot’s of love… etc. and give her a * ton of moola so she doesn’t pull a Calvin Harris?

  80. BennyLavaandtheJets says

    Tom Hiddleston

    Taylor Swift

    He’s upset because the whole world knows that her * looks like a messy ham sandwich.

    (I have no idea who this is. I’m still so freaked out by the sandwich analogy that I can’t think about anything else.)

  82. stanton says

    The Queen Bradley Cooper. His “Girlfriend” and him were fighting. She ended up crying at Wimbledon.

    Come out Bradley. The closet is a prison. Besides there is not enough room for you and John Travolta

  83. gypsyjones says

    Actor: Bradley Cooper
    G/F: Irina Shayk

    If I were him I’d live an honest life. These fauxmance things are gross.

  87. Ohmysmh says

    Taylor Swift and hiddleson she….cut her loose …she lost you bond no one wants a whipped bond, just shaken not stirred

  90. carmen sanbernadino says

    Bradley Cooper and Irina Shayk, most likely; they were having some kind of fight at Wimbledon yesterday and the TV cameras caught it.

  94. lepidoteran says

    Bradley Cooper
    Irina Shayk

    Optional: I would give up this stupid contract girlfriend ridiculosity. But if he’s going to go with it, find someone who won’t cry at Wimbledon for the love of Pete!

  97. iknowiknow says

    Bradley Cooper and his model girlfriend Irina. She started to tear up at Wimbleton. He needs to stop with the PR relationships and just be himself.

  99. blutegel says

    Obviously Bradley Cooper and Irina Shayk who was recently spotted crying at Wimbledon.