Yesterday night marked the first night of Chanukah! Unlike Obama, we’re sure you know that you’re only supposed to light one candle per night (plus the middle one) on the menorah, not set the whole thing ablaze like a candelabra in a one percenter’s home.
Did you get a present last night? No? Such a shonda! Well, we have one for you! You’re getting a BG12345 today. Happy Chanukah, everyone!