Tall Tales About Marriage

SOLVED!

[Blind Gossip] This famous model is greatly exaggerating her situation. She has been dating this famous musician for only a few months, but is telling people that he is madly in love with her, is ready to marry her, and is begging to move in with her.

No. Not even close.

He has never allowed a woman to dictate the terms of their relationship, nor has he ever changed his life around to suit them. This one is no different.

We don’t know why she is telling this tall tale but we do notice that she has managed to put out new stories about herself frequently in the past month or so. She’s pushing something.

Similar: Proposal Needs More Drama

Model:

Musician:

[Optional] Why is she telling this tale?

SOLVED!

Model: Christie Brinkley

Musician: John Mellencamp

Here’s a little ditty… about a liar and a Midwestern boy.

Christie Brinkley and John Mellencamp just broke up after a year of dating.

They started dating in September 2015. In December, Brinkley began putting out stories about how Mellencamp was already madly in love with her and ready to move in and marry her but that she was the one who was hesitating.

Ha! Not even close to being true!

Brinkley is always looking for attention so she can sell her skin care line or her book or her wine or whatever. Dragging JM into it, though, was just wrong.

These two were an odd match from the beginning.

Mellencamp was born in Indiana and has lived there for all of his 64 years. He has repeatedly said that he is never moving. He has five kids, has been married three times, and is in no rush for #4. While he has been sober since the 1970s, he smokes three or four packs of cigarettes a day. He has eschewed any kind of plastic surgery and has aged naturally.

Mellancamp likes his Midwestern lifestyle, doesn’t care much about mingling with society people, and doesn’t go out of his way to garner publicity.

Brinkley, the ex-wife of musician Billy Joel, has three children, has been married four times, and has lived in New York since the 1970s. She eats a vegan diet and exercises regularly. Plastic surgery (though denied by her) keeps her looking young.

Brinkley loves the New York/Hamptons/international travel lifestyle, high society, and being seen.

Mellencamp was NEVER going to move in with her and he NEVER even mentioned marriage to her. It was all just lies on Brinkley’s part. Because she is only worth $100 million, she needs for you to pay attention to her so she can sell you stuff. And in order to sell you stuff, she needs to make herself seem desirable. Because everybody is in love with an Uptown Girl, right?

Apparently not.

Here’s the announcement from Us Weekly:

Christie Brinkley and John Mellencamp Split After One Year of Dating

It’s over. Christie Brinkley and John Mellencamp have split after one year of dating, Us Weekly can confirm.

“Both the mileage between their homes and their heavy career demands interfered with their ability to maintain the relationship,” a rep for the couple tells Us. “They vowed to remain best of friends.”

Mellencamp, 64, is currently gearing up for a new leg of his Plain Spoken tour — which continues in Bristow, Virginia, on September 17 — while Brinkley, 62, has been busy in recent months promoting Bellissima, her new prosecco.

The duo first stepped out as a couple in September 2015 when they went on a dinner date in New York City.

Congratulations to Quincytoo for being first with the correct answer. And props to everyone who still refers to JM as John Cougar!

You can buy John Cougar/John Mellencamp’s music here.

If you would like to hurt so good, watch this video. It takes place in 1982, a time when all John Cougar’s girlfriends wore leather and chains and all his male friends looked like Hell’s Angels applicants.