 Which celebrity has taken drastic measures to eliminate the baby weight? Always thin before pregnancy, she was unhappy with her post partum body. So she had a lapband installed to get off those last pesky ten pounds. Her weight has now plummeted to alarming lows. Her partner’s pleas to remove the lapband are falling on deaf ears, as she is convinced her weight will skyrocket if it is removed. lg
 Which well-known actor has at least two female celebrities running to the clinic? This male actor is of the scruffy-attractive variety. He has a reputation for being wild both in and out of the sack, and has had bedded quite a few celebrities. Unfortunately for all involved, he also has a dangerous STD and favors unprotected sex. A very famous blonde celebrity and a perpetually troubled black rapper are among those who are now terrified for their health.
 CDAN – New celebrity mom. Same old tricks. When daddy is away, mom has been popping pills that she is getting from her doctor. At the same time she has another doctor who is keeping her hooked on hillbilly heroin. Must be fun for the baby. Must be why dad is spending so much time away from mom.
Editor’s Note: Hillbilly Heroin = OxyContin
 Foreign born B lister who is the lead in his Top 20 network television show. If you are going to do some work on our actor’s house, you may want to consider insurance or an attorney. A group of workers were repairing our actor’s roof. One of them slipped on the roof and fell to the ground. Injured badly. Our actor would not let the man into his home, and said that because the hurt worker was an illegal immigrant, his home insurance would not cover the injury, that no one would care about him one way or the other, and to just get him off the actor’s property.
 BlindGossip – Which well-known actor has at least two female celebrities running to the clinic? This male actor is of the scruffy-attractive variety. He has a reputation for being wild both in and out of the sack, and has had bedded quite a few celebrities. Unfortunately for all involved, he has a dangerous STD and favors unprotected sex. A very famous blonde celebrity and a perpetually troubled black rapper are among those who are now terrified for their health.
 This celebrity repeatedly denied pregnancy rumors. Despite an obvious baby bump, she claimed to have just gained some weight, but had no plans to go on a diet. She was not going to announce until her pregnancy had reach the stage where she was convinced she could carry to term. Sadly, she has miscarried once again. bg
 Who is calling in sick to work and giving a fake excuse? Everyone! One is hooked on an extremely addictive prescription drug. One is experiencing severe post-breakup depression. One is pregnant, but will not be announcing anytime soon. And, finally, one is genuinely ill but will recover fully and will be back to work soon.
 CDAN – Intellectual B list actor. I say intellectual because he seems like he has a brain, and he has made a career of films in which a person actually has to think. Kind of like the Parker Posey for actors, but younger. Well, our actor had to take about a six month mandatory break from filming because he could not get insured. Though he has managed to stay out of the headlines, his problems are very Lindsay Lohanish minus the family drama. During his last film, he did so much coke that he had to get his nose repaired. Because of this, before any insurance company would back him, they wanted him to go to rehab which he did for three months. He also has to submit to weekly drug screening as a condition to being insured.
 This celebrity has been out of the spotlight for a little while. You are in for a real shock when you see her. Bones and veins popping out everywhere. She has always been slim, but she now looks completely emaciated. Stylists are hard at work crafting wardrobe and hair and makeup to mask the problem for public appearances. They even discussed having her wear a slimmed down version of a fat suit – to make her look as if she was of normal weight – but the celeb nixed it.
 Some new information about one of the bigger breakups of the year. It was an A list actor and a wannabe. Apparently the A list actor found out that the wannabe had stopped taking birth control. He found this out when she told him she might be pregnant. Apparently he felt that her purposefully not taking the pill in order to get pregnant violated a rule and showed her the curb. c
 Which celebrity has been doing massive quantities of the white stuff to alleviate the pain of her sham relationship? For a while there, she seemed to have a charmed life: a talented partner, a beautiful home, adorable kids, a hit television series as well as forays into films. But as her fake relationship has crumbled, she has drifted deeper and deeper into the white stuff. Now it’s taken over her life. She has lost so much weight and is so thin and so unhappy, but her friends don’t know how to save both her and her public image. bg
 Which celebrity has a good reason for lying about her pregnancy? Two earlier unpublicized miscarriages make her hesitant about announcing too soon, so she is telling everyone that she simply gained weight for a role. She’ll go public at the six month point, which is coming up very soon. Once she announces the pregnancy, she will lie about the due date, as she wants the delivery to be a private family affair.
 Which clothing designer daughter and her husband are stirring the pot on both coasts? On the east coast, she had tongues wagging in Los Angeles over her plunging weight, while on the the west coast her other half was recently kicked out of a Hamptons New York hot spot for slugging another guy.
 The Mirror – Which lanky actor claims he’s always been skinny but actually his continuing weight loss has more to do with a two-gram-a-day coke addiction?
 BlindGossip – Which Dancing With the Stars dancer is definitely not enjoying working with the celebrity to whom they have been assigned? The dancer has told friends that the star has such bad body odor that they are finding it hard to be in the same room with them.
SOLVED!
» Continued
 NYPost – Which reality-TV judge was absent from two of her top-rated shows because she had a bad reaction to Botox? Spies said the fashionista’s face “swelled up like a cauliflower”.
 BlindGossip – Which gangsta rapper loves to be pampered? He loves his daily bubble bath and shoulder massages. Such a tough exterior, such tender skin.
SOLVED!
» Continued
 Which actress lied to get out of a professional commitment? While she was trying to impress everyone with her ability to do it all, she couldn’t, and then had to fake an injury to bail out of a job. No surprise that the last minute cancellation did not please the project managers.
 NYDN – Which socialite fashionista had to have her boyfriend’s assistant bring her a change of clothes at the Bryant Park tents this week after soiling her skivvies?
 Which skinny TV host is hiding an eating disorder? During a recent work lunch, she went up to the buffet five times. Then she disappeared to the bathroom only a few minutes after each course.
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