This gay actor has an actual paper contract drawn up by his attorney, that all of his fake girlfriends are required to sign. They agree to talk publicly about how powerful and manly he is, and he agrees to buy them what they want. All the women are busty and beautiful, and he thinks that it is a cover that no one can see through.

hugh hefner!!
ed westwick, who was seen making out with drew barrymore a few days ago. he’s definitely bi, or at least bicurious. i know for a fact (from a few inside sources) that he and chace crawford are lovers.
the dude from girls gone wild!
P. Diddy?
John Mayer? We hear about his wandering eye all the time.
ryan seacrest
John Mayer is spot on.
Really? John Mayer is spot on? Cuz Aniston is so “chesty”? And he’s not an actor, and I’ve never heard his gf’s talk about how manly he is.
george clooney
george clooney