Boxer Hole Man

boxer shorts 3[Lainey Gossip] Inexplicably, he’s been linked to some really hot, pretty famous women, even though he’s not exactly hot and he behaves, at least artistically, like a douchebag.

What’s the attraction? Certainly not his sex moves. This won’t solve the mystery either.

When it’s time to fuck, he doesn’t like doing it at home. Which is weird because, well, he’s really weird about germs and touching. And you’d think his house would be cleaner than a hotel, right?

So he and whoever he’s about to do it with are at the hotel. They’re about to do it. Only he won’t take his clothes off. Instead, he’ll always keep his underwear on, looping his dick through the boxer hole so as to minimise as much skin-on-skin contact as possible.

Maybe that’s why it never lasts?

BG Note: We’re adding this guy to our Blind Gossip Weird Sex Hall of Fame. Remember these guys?

House Of Crazy

Athlete Has A Secret Closet

Actor Is Fixated On This One Feature

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    • Okayeah says

      Could be. Whoever it is, the real question is why do they even bother trying to have sex when it’s obviously so uncomfortable for them?

    • KWDragon says

      I think he is a d-bag, but I also think he is damn hot. It’s a pitiable conundrum, but I doubt this is him.

      • PrettyInPink84 says

        I think it fits perfectly. He is hot to us, but by “Hollywood standards” he is not the typical pretty boy. Then they drop the word artistically = He is an artist and has shown thiks side publically A LOT. And they call him a douchebag.. There is a website that always refers to JF as a douchebag.

      • KWDragon says

        What famous women has he been linked to? I can’t think of any right off the bat. Otherwise, I could buy your argument.

    • MissMoney says

      This is exactly who I think it is as well. He’s been linked to several beautiful famous women including Charlise (sp) Theron and is a douchebag for entertainment purposes.

    • daisy12 says

      Yes to this! He was also with someone from Game of Thrones earlier this year who was way out of his league. And I’m pretty sure he doesn’t like shaking hands/germs.

  1. Enigma says

    Well, if he’s “weird” about germs, he probably does not want to contaminate his house with body fluids… wonder what he does with the boxer-short (and himself) before going back home…

    No idea who this is might be, but I’m sorry for him, OCD sucks…

  2. commonsense says

    This has GOT to be Kanye. Clues being everything. But Im confused, if he’s such a germophobe, why have sex with the biggest walking STD fungus troll there is?

  3. VexTheVixen says

    A John Mayer vibe is coming at me from this one. In photos, you never see him touching any of the women he is with, his hands are usually jammed in his pockets, and his hook-ups seem to involve photos of him and his lady of the moment exiting hotels. After his heart scare as a teen, I can see him being wary of germs. He never looks very healthy either. Prior to buying a home in Montana last year, did anyone know where he actually lived?

    • BobNYC says

      It can’t be John Mayer. He couldn’t possibly be a germaphobe considering where he like to bury his face. It’s a powerful fetish for him.

    • Mumumumu says

      He was on the Howard Stern once, and he said his OCD can be so consuming that when he stays at a hotel he brings pillows, pillowcases, bedspreads, towels, floor mats.

      I don’t think it’s him though. But if it is, that’s a lot of work just to get some shagging. (not sure if I’m allowed to use this word here, don’t mean to be crass).

  4. thefrozenqueen says

    Rhys Ifans? Known for douchey behaviour during interviews and linked to Kate Moss, Sienna Miller, Kimberly Stuart and Anna Friel.
    Although he doesn’t look like he’s having a problem with germs and touching.

  5. shelbylake says

    First reaction was John Mayer. Second, James Franco…but I don’t know enough about his relationships. Just guessing here!

  6. ChampagneFlight says

    Joseph Gordon Levitt- noooo! My dreams ruined. Clues – mysterious (skin,) looping and his most recent DonJon.

    • Jaqaranda says

      Good guesses on the clues but I think few people would describe JGL as “not exactly hot”. Dream away, my friend :).

  7. silence1534 says

    This sounds like David Spade to me. Heather Locklear, the model baby mama, and always seems to play a**holes.

    • channel orange says

      LOL, someone reads Dlisted! *high fives*

      Personally, this blind made me think of Seth McFarlane. Super douchey professionally, definitely in possession of a weirdly shaped head/face = not hot, and inexplicably linked to super hot women. Besides, he gives off a weirdo vibe.

  8. boyjack4 says

    Ashton Kutchner?
    Lainey has called him a couch bag today and she usually akes sureshe links her blinds to something in her Blind!

  9. katt388 says

    Just a guess – David Spade. He seems to get hot girls but he is weird BUT he does give them great gifts. Had a pal who used to wait on him is a fancy Bev Hills boutique. He spent big bucks

    • mugofmead111 says

      If that were true, that would add a whole other layer of weird to the Lauren Silverman situation. (That’d be an interesting way to conceive a baby) 😉

  10. augustmom says

    Howie Mandel has been married to the same woman since 1980, so he wouldn’t be openly known as a bagger of babes.

  11. Rosario Scarsci says

    I was going to guess Howie Mandel. Sidenote: When I was a teen, one of my friends said, that if a man has s*x with his boxers on, and puts his friend through the hole only, it COULD be because he has a rash and doesn’t want you to see it. I laughed but it could be true. Just a warning…

    • creeping_thistle says

      Just my thought too. I can think of only these reasons for keeping boxers on:

      – Fear of women’s yucky fluids (then you need some therapy, kid).

      – Lice or crabs which he doesn’t want to give to the next woman, fearing an almighty scandal and probably being sued (get thee to a doctor, kid)

      – Er…. does he have five testicles? Or one? Or what? Do they glow in the dark? Something he’d prefer to hide to the ladies in case they run away? (get thee to a doctor, again)

      • nolabelle says

        All good ones. I thought maybe he has embarrassment or very low self esteem on some unusually small testes, which might be harder to assess this way?or they are uglier for some reason, diff colorations, heck , he ‘s really got a serious problem, if not physical, def mental issues. Don’t these women get his mental illness?

    • PandoraWolf says

      I’d prefer thinking Adrian Brody is the no-holds-barred, “let’s get naked RIGHT HERE so I can swing my *ahem* nose in your direction and tear you up” type. I’ll never know, so I will dream…

      Ryan Phillipe: DOUCHEBAG. I like this answer.

  12. augustmom says

    I am liking the Billy Bob Thornton guess, but am wondering if the Pinocchio was a hint? Someone Disney connected, perhaps?

  13. amyliz730 says

    John Mayer comes off as a douchebag but I don’t know if he does creatively? And I also thought he was dating Katy Perry, at least publicly

    • mugofmead111 says

      All I can think of was his infamous Playboy interview from 2010. That was like the height of douchebaggery.

  14. janepublic says

    David Spade. Plays a d-bag in every show he’s on and is famous for sleeping with everyone from Carmen Electra, Heather Locklear and Pam Anderson to Jillian Barberie, George Clooney ex Krista Allen, and even Buffy (Kristy Swanson – the original Buffy!). Maybe he’s not so much a germaphobe but just a little weirdo…

    • mugofmead111 says

      Years later, I’m still scratching my head over the David Spade/Heather Locklear coupling.

      I guess the d-bag act crosses over into real life too from what’s been reported at how he dealt with the surprise kid situation.

    • Wannabe Sherlock says

      Hmmmn, my original guess was Shia LaBeouf, but you make a very good argument for David Spade.

    • PandoraWolf says

      I think any blind referencing Wilmer is required by law to include the word “buttseks”.

  15. KatarinaJ says

    A lot of the guesses fit. David Spade, John Mayer, both have artistically ‘douchebag’ reps and have been with SUPER hot women. Mayer has a rep though of being a bit of a lothario. Would Aniston, Jessica Simpson, ALL these women put up with Mayer being like this when his ‘rep’ is being a monster in bed I think? Jim Carey was linked to Lauren Holly, Jenny McCarthy, some hot women but is he known artistically as an a-hole, probably not? Still, his personality issues are well known. I’d say David Spade.

  16. pinkmouse says

    John Mayer. Lainey also posted a story about Katy Perry right after this blind item, which supports the Mayer theory even more!

  17. linds says

    I wonder if it could be Adam Levine. He’s definitely been linked to hot women, and even though I don’t think he’s a d-bag, I know Lainey doesn’t like him. Plus “sex moves” made me think of “moves like Jagger.”

  18. CecilyElliott says

    Notoriously anti-germ: won’t shake hands for this reason
    D-bag behavior: “You’re Fired”
    Hotel: owns many of them
    Been with/married to/linked to gorgeous women

    • Naimit says

      I like your guess! One problem though: Donald bagging gorgeou$ women i$ anything but inexplicable. I believe hi$ attraction ha$ $omething to do with hi$ many bank account$.

      That said, if I were to hook up with Don (oh god no), he could wear his boxers so long as I could wear my full body hazmat suit.

  19. Wannabe Sherlock says

    I love the Billy Bob T and Donald T guesses, but here’s one more for the pot – Shia LaBeouf. I have never understood that guy’s appeal. He’s not attractive and yet has girlfriends that are way hotter than him, despite being a total d*che. He also did / is doing that awful movie with real sex in it after turning his back on Hollywood to be more ‘artistic’ in his work.

  20. igotthisone says

    I like Jeremy Piven.

    Trump, Mayer, and even Mac Farlane, you can understand the appeal in their bank account$. Jeremy Piven is a successful actor, but he is in no way iconic or with an empire like these other men.

    Also, Pinocchio boxers for his whole mercury poisoning lie scandal!

  21. saucykitty says

    What, nobody’s mentioned the infamous Tobias Funke? I hear he’s the next big thing… and he was brilliant as Frightened Inmate #2. 😉