Rubbers Booze Camera

SOLVED!

[NationalEnquirer]  Which super-famous young star was recently spotted making a late-night drugstore run for condoms, booze and a disposable camera? The 22-year-old actress is supposedly dating her equally famous film co-star, but he was nowhere in sight.

SOLVED!

It’s Kristen Stewart! Source: Blind Gossip and Everywhere

So 22-year-old actress Kristen Stewart had an affair with her Snow White Director Rupert Sanders. They were filmed dining and canoodling and hugging and kissing and lying on top of each other and steaming up car windows by Us Weekly Magazine in May, June, and July of this year.

Although The National Enquirer ran the blind, Us Weekly did a very thorough job of breaking the story (complete with photos). They have multiple items on their site detailing every bit of the affair, from baseball caps to apologies. The best part was Kristen’s apology:

“I’m deeply sorry for the hurt and embarrassment I’ve caused to those close to me and everyone this has affected. This momentary indiscretion has jeopardized the most important thing in my life, the person I love and respect the most, Rob. I love him, I love him, I’m so sorry.”

Meh. In our book, three months isn’t “momentary”.

Fox News ran a story with an interesting headline. “Kristen Stewart: From Hollywood’s highest paid actress to its second most famous home wrecker”. (Translation: Don’t worry, Angelina, you may be #2 in earnings, but you’re still #1 in home-wrecking!)

PR expert Glenn Selig … was perplexed by the melodramatic nature of the [apology] “…so over-the-top and so dramatic it’s almost like they believe they’re starring in their very own movie,” he said. “It’s very bizarre and strange, even by Hollywood standards.”

We agree. To add to the strangeness, Kristen insists that they never had sex. Even though the affair went on for months. Kristen Stewart must think that people are really dumb. You don’t need condoms and alcohol and disposable cameras for kissing. But we will admit that it was smart of her to grab a disposable camera. Those suckers can’t be hacked.
Interestingly, Stewart lamented to Elle Magazine earlier this summer that her life was too “boring.”

“You can learn so much from bad things. I feel boring. I feel like, Why is everything so easy for me? I can’t wait for something crazy to f**king happen to me. Just life,” she said. “I want someone to f**k me over!”

It looks like she may have done that all by herself.

Everybody got this right, but NJacksonOO was first! Congratulations!
Finally, here is a lovely photo of Kristen Stewart and Rupert Sanders. Kristen is impeccably dressed for her interview at Goldman Sachs after the premiere of Snow White and The Huntsman.
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