Pop Star Is Not So Squeaky Clean

SOLVED!

[NationalEnquirer] Which squeaky-clean pop star is desperately trying to keep his p*t-smoking habit and hookups with a Las Vegas ho*ker under wraps? The young crooner’s famous girlfriend wouldn’t care so much about his wacky weed habit, but she probably wouldn’t appreciate the cheating!

justin bieber modelsSOLVED!

It’s Justin Bieber! Source: BlindGossip.com

Yes, you can now add ho*kers to the list of Justin’s vices!

Contrary to some reports, Justin Bieber is not a lesbian. And he’s definitely not squeaky clean anymore. He is actually just a typically horny teenage boy.

And when you give a horny teenage boy lots of money, you shouldn’t be surprised when he spends it on alcohol, dru*gs, gold chains, tattoos, cars… and girls.

So, when Justin was in Vegas about a year ago, he figured that Nevada would be the perfect place to hire a pro (prostitution is legal and regulated in Nevada). You might be wondering: Why would a young pop star hire an escort instead of just taking one of the millions of screaming fans/actresses/models/singers who would kill/die/cut themselves to spend five minutes with him?

Esc*rts don’t squeal. They are professionals. You don’t have to worry about them running to the National Enquirer, or filing paternity suits, or posting their fanfic-come-to-life stories on Tumblr. We don’t know if the esc*rt thing happened more than once, but given his love for Las Vegas, you never know! Hey, Biebs, there’s still a day left until the end of the 2013 Consumer Electronics Show!

BTW, the pot thing made Selena Gomez mad, but the h*oker thing made her furious. Hope you wrapped it up, Justin!

Lots of you got this right. Congrats to Sweet Toulouse for being first!

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