EOnline – It’s a good thing Super-Duper Cooper, whose bedroom habits stink to high heaven, is pretty hot. Otherwise, what you’re about to read would be virtually impossible to fathom. I mean, k*nky sex is one thing, but totally debauched, gross-out nooky with an ever grosser-looking partner would be just beyond hideous, right?
Still, babes, hold off on eating your lunch ‘cause what you’re fixing to read, about what Super’s been up to, will probably make you want toss your cookies:
Coop, who still manages to bed all the good-looking gals he can find (despite claiming the opposite), recently stayed at his fave deluxe Vegas hotel. The place was used to catering to Cooper’s starry ways: Women constantly in and out of his room, the suite always left a mess, etc. Nobody ever said anything, discretion is this celeb hang’s policy!
But that was before.
After Super-Duper’s most recent stay, he left behind a gift. It was a bag, actually. The housekeeper found it. She opened it up, thinking she’d get a delightful, vicarious big-celebrity thrill, getting a look at the fancy stuff before, of course, returning it to management so Super could retrieve his forgotten goodies.
Well, guess what she found? A bunch of s–t. Literally. Now, technically, they were crap-covered bed linens (which, clearly, Coop was planning on throwing out, but forgot). But listen up, the predominant ingredient in that damn bag was overwhelmingly made of human feces. With a nice chaser of dried seminal fluid, just to top things off nicely.
Now, Super, you bizarro perv, we already knew you were into sex-with-poop, but the thing we don’t get—like at all—is where the hell do you find these chicks who participate in the stinky stuff, too? Are they really into it, or do they just play along (and hold their noses)?
Or are we just boring old vanilla-sex types, and is fornication with turds the new black? Are we that behind with the latest trends? Do tell, Super! Tweet us an answer, pronto, por favor!
At any rate, the Vegas joint’s concierges are at a loss as to what they’re going to say to Super next time he books a room. May we suggest: “So very sorry we can’t accommodate you, Mr. Cooper, but unfortunately, we’re as full as your bowels.”
And It Ain’t: Justin Timberlake, Kanye West, Colin Farrell
Jamie Fox
Good guess. He was in Miami Vice, the movie, with Colin Farrell. He did a song with Kanye West (“Slow Jams”) and like Justin he is a singer and actor.
I like this guess.
Wait…this may be wrong. Jamie and John are much more open anout their ladies and the blind says “Coop, who still manages to bed all the good-looking gals he can find (despite claiming the opposite)”
So it has to be someone who claims innocent or have a clean cut image…or something of the sort. Right?
John is a man* who will sleep with any woman or man…
Jamie …well he talks about the honeys and has dated good looking women… Any other guess?
Plus, wasn’t it Jamie Fox who made a stink about any women he’s with having to clean her vajajay before she gets within ten feet of him. Or am I thinking of someone else?
Terrence Howard. He will only consider hittin it if a woman uses babywipes. Cause thats classy ladies roll.
That was Terrance Howard.
see now I thought Kanye.
John Mayer
My first thought.
Also, the clue about “tweet us an answer”. . . isn’t Mayer a notorious Twitard?
That would mean he reads the Twilight books. I’d rather know he likes to poop on people than that he reads those.
Hunh. Guess that just means he’s a twit. Har.
Yes! John has always been the top guess for SDC. I wonder what all he got Taylor Swift to partake in?!!
and he recently said stuff along the lines of “im gonna be good now, no more sleeping around and talking about women.” paraphrasing, of course.
Little late in posting, but this was my first guess as well…
Exactly how do we know that someone did not just * in a bag and left it there??? Any evidence if it was actually used for sex??
Oh btw. LLLLLOONNNG time lurker, first time poster. (since August)
John Mayer…pretty much all the other Super Duper Cooper ones narrowed it to him. Ok, I know I’m thinking too much about this, but here’s what I’m wondering: did he get Aniston into the poop stuff too? I’m guessing no, but yes for Jessica Simpson (that girl will go along with anything the guy wants)
I, for one, do not consider John Mayer “pretty hot.” Sorry you had to read that John…
Me either. He looks like someone’s dorky neighbor who plays football by himself in the front yard in tiny shorts.
Lol: I can totally picture that! Sorry John…
Maybe it was just an accident during anal sex. With drugs and booze, I imagine such things could occur.
A bit of heroin withdrawal would definitely cause that also. I get all my drug info from Trainspotting.
LOL So do I. Great movie.
I like the Jamie Fox guess, but either way that’s a big ewwwwwwwww for me.
Yes, quite gross. Scat is…ewww.
I get all mine from Intervention. LOL
Thank you for the literal Laugh out Loud.
Great movie, excellent music
an accident is a possible explanation for this story.
but ted’s other blinds about SUPER DOOP allude to the COOP liking SEX & POOP.
Why??? Please do not answer, I don’t really want to contemplate this nastiness any further.
Mario Lopez
Wow…that model looks like he’s fixing to take a dump. He looks like Ryan Phillipe too.
Uhm, that’s Justin Timberlake…
Wow, who knew Justin Timberlake had such a nice body?
I just took a second look.
He does look like he is taking a dump.
It’ called Photoshop!
LOL!
Yet another John Mayer blind. He’s something else.
I didn’t know he had such a nice bod.
PhotoShop is wonderful.
photoshop does wonders.
Eminem!!! I think this is a rapper asd Vanilla Ice refference..mmmmmm Hope not cause this is gross
OK there´s no Vanilla Ice refference just Vanilla lol I read it wrong…
Ice ice baby!
jamie or john. I was just having my lunch and when they said we needed to put my lunch aside i did, but i almost puke.ewwwwww
This is making me look at Rachel Ray in a whole new way. *Shudder*.
Totally John Mayer. Did his check bounce or something?
Previous AIA’s for Super Duper Cooper:
Kiefer Sutherland, Chris Rock, Nick Lachey, Tommy Lee, Matthew McConaughey, Christian Bale, Derek Jeter, Ryan Gosling, R. Kelly, Pete Wentz, Chace Crawford, Tom Brady, Chris Evans, Orlando Bloom, Tony Romo, Derek Jeter, Matthew McConaughey
For some reason I picture Chris Rock saying, “How the hell did I get thrown in there?!?!?”
I was thinking the same thing about Ryan Gosling! haha
AAAAHHH!!! I’m in moderation, but this is John Mayer all the way.
It’s John Mayer.
my most favorite thing is “we are as full as you bowels”….GENIUS…
Tiger Woods
Coop is just nasty.
“the new black”? is that a clue that it’s an African American guy? I’m on the Jamie Foxx bandwagon …
No it’s a clue for what Mayer said about not sleeping with black women.
Apparently only Kerry Washington and Holly (cant remember her last name).
I dont think it’s jamie foxx because there were blinds alluding to him being gay, and having Stacy Dash be his beard.
holly peete she defended john until she heard the entire comments john made.
Idea – you should buy the website name “Blind Filth” and recycle this as the first item.
You’re welcome – lols
I am so glad that I’m financially challenged and non-famous and will therefore never, ever sleep in any hotel room previously occupied by John Mayer.
Thank God for little favors.
Amen.
i concur
Wait so John Mayer likes sleeping with married TV almost reality stars, poop on them and then look at gay porn?
I read it as he is pooping on the semi-reality star while watching gay porn, but otherwise, yes.
LOL!!!! That is so funny!! thanks. Have a great weekend everybody and thanks for another wonderful week of great responses. You folks make my day.
Sounds like a new Bravo Series: Real Weirdos of LA County
Off topic, because the pic is unrelated, but am I the only one who thinks Justin Timberlake is a butterface? Not cute, no no no.
I’ll guess Sean Combs.
I’m with ya.
agree on this.
yea justin look as if he aged a whole lot.
Nope. You are not alone in thinking JT is a butterface.
Coop, who still manages to bed all the good-looking gals he can find (despite claiming the opposite), recently stayed at his fave deluxe Vegas hotel.
John Mayer has been claiming to sit at home playing games on his new ipad.
Mayer. Isnt he also the celeb who likes to be urinated on?
I believe the rumor was that he peed and pooped on Jessica Simpson. Not to mention knocking her up, talking her into an abortion and then dumping her. That dude is messed up.
No more than she is messed up if she let him do all that!
Jamie Fox is gay. so not him.
John Meyer.
Haha.
I would not mind takeing a dump om a few men . I would not stay around for the festivitys … The guy must be a real jerk who ever he is .
way back in the days of old Hollywood there was actor Charles Laughton who did the dirty. Even Marlon liked a little kink. Now think outside the box. back in the late 60s-early 70s there was a well known musician who had an sm/leather bar in Hollywood and catered to all the celebs. How many up and coming stars braved mud wrestling at Pig Boy’ manse. Who now is rumored to be into S/M, Toys etc. And too many drugs can cause an accident. Is this a singular or more than 2x occurence. could be anyone.
we all like to be kinky, but that is down right nasty.lol
i don’t think John Mayer really claims the opposite to sleeping with a lot of women or at least the ones that are famous.
he promised to reform himself after the playboy interview
This is so revolting… I like to think I’m pretty open minded, but this stuff awakens my inner prude big time. I’m doubting the “accident” theory. Wouldn’t you at least get some toilet paper and attempt some kind of clean up if it were so?
Anyway, I guess John Mayer. There’s the pee thing [shudders] plus when he was dating Jessica Simpson Lainey posted that one hotel where they stayed in Rome had to THROW OUT a mattress they used. Plus he just seems creepy enough to do it, and arrogant enough to leave it for some poor maid to clean up.
PS I don’t think Sean Coombs. He looks the type to make a woman go and shower three times before he’d even kiss her.
diddy is kinky and neat, so he won’t have that.lol
John Mayer for the win!
Mayer’s 3 months must be up?
Gerard Butler?
I have no clue…but EEEWWW!
Since John Mayer came on itunes shuffle while I was reading this, I will guess him too. He comes across as a little off in the head to me. I don’t know if he really wants attention or if he is bi-polar. It’s hard to figure out.
How would they have identified seminal fluid on the poop?
I hope someone saved a sample for DNA testing.
Am I the only one thinking this could be Ashton Kutcher? He is pretty hot, gets laid with random chicks and – being married – probably he tries to hide the cheating more than someone single like John Mayer. What do you think, people?
I like the Mayer guess… but what do you all think about Ashton Kutcher?? He’s a huge tweet geek, denies bedding the chicks he’s been bedding, and that last line, “…can’t accomodate you mr. cooper…” sounds like “can’t accomodate you mr. Kutcher”. Oh, and my Vegas money is on the fact that this one will NEVER be revealed!!
I forgot about the fact he is a Tweet freak!
This is the first person I thought of. Ashton…just gross.
Considering the Tweeting, if this was Mayer, wouldn’t he tweet about it: Just pinched a loaf on babe!
Lol!
It was just Glen Beck playing with his poop again.
He must have been cleaning his ears. Everyone knows what a s**thead he is.
All the rock and rollers (The Stones, The Beatle, the WHO, Led Zepplin, etc) combined didn’t do anything this weird.
uhhhh. i dont know about that. poop might never have been involved, but poops not the only weird thing you can get into.
I guess you never heard the story about Motley Crue, a random groupie, a ceiling fan and a bottle of soda. Ummm, let’s just say the mess that maid had to clean up was bigger.
*shudders*
Wasn’t there also an old story about. . . was it Led Zepp and a fish? Something about a groupie and a fish?
Inquiring minds want to know, what happened?? I never heard that story and couldn’t come up with anything on Google.
Anyone bother to google if any of these guys were in Vegas in the last few weeks. That young stud from True Blood was there over Halloween.
No one mentioned him yet.
Question: Does whomever this is make his conquests sign some kind of contract? How come this hasn’t been splashed, so to speak, all over the tabloids?
There was a blind a while back that said something about him taking pictures of the his partners covered in… well, you know.
One slip to the tabloids, their photo would be leaked (snicker) as well. They’d have as much to loose (if not more) than him.
Everyone knows John Mayer is a freak. But a picture of Jennifer Aniston covered in scat? Priceless!
Damn. Effective hush-hush there. Maybe I need to consider that as a method of future blackmail. . .
And yes, priceless. I’d max out a credit card to see that.
I’m wondering about the clue “tweet us an answer pronto, por favor.” Could he be hispanic, who tweets? I can’t think of anyone…
Wilmer?
great guess-I just googled “Wilmer” and “Vegas” and looks like in May and June he was at the TAO/Venetian with Tara Reid (I’m sure she would willingly participate in any creepiness with anybody anytime, hands down).
probably a coincidence, but if you search for Super Duper Cooper on eonline, the first link that comes up is “bitch back: everyone hates john mayer”
I did some more googling and Wilmer is an investor in one of Luxor’s restaurants. “deluxe” = Luxor?
Ok, one more guess.. maybe Ray J.
“we already knew you were into sex-with-poop”… he made the sex tape with Kim K who allegedly is into anal.
Leo DiCaprio
Roberta, I dont think its Kutcher. I cant see Demi getting into Poop and I am pretty sure one of his disgruntled ex’s would have spilled the beans to the tabloids about this.
John Mayer. There’ve been too many stories about his poopy inclinations…
How about the Butterscotch Stallion?
Who’s this? Never heard that nickname before..
Owen Wilson. He’s had that nickname for awhile. I think it started at Defamer. He sprung to mind cuz of the ‘vanilla’ and also cuz it’s known that his thing is tossing the salad.
I don’t think he totally fits, tho. He doesn’t tweet (I don’t think..), and I don’t know if he’s known to frequent Vegas…or even if he’s considered pretty hot. 
John Mayer deleted his Twitter account awhile ago..so it can’t be him
I think that might have been more of an indication that it’s someone who is known to be a big tweeter, which John is. John, Ashton or Kanye have my vote!
John Mayer, only because it would have to be someone who already is decadent to the point of being a sexual deviate and if he’s bedded half the women he alludes he has then the stakes would have to keep going up in order for him to get off. Either that or Jessica Simpson farting in bed was the beginning of the end! He probably likes to sniff armpits too! Ewwwwwww. What a scumsucking bottomfeeder.
pete wentz
just..ew!
John M or Kanye
Antonio Banderas? He’s Latin but nah, doesn’t tweet I don’t think.
It might be Michael Phelps. The hotel is a Palms suite
Lil Wayne…It was recently reportedly that he was banned from the Wynn. They did not comment on why.
I think you’re right,