EOnline – Handsome enough, Fruzzy Tuna-Stench has never really had much of a problem with the ladies—that’s because they usually don’t tip each other off! Take a recent conquest of Fruzzy’s, a babe who was so delighted to have found herself in Mr. Tuna-Stench’s Hollywood Hills home, she wanted to squeal! Oh, my! And they’d only been dating for a bit, she thought, and he’s already taken her into his private and storied man-quarters, such an achievement!
So there they are, the gorgeous brown-locked luscious one and her very, very famous bed partner, writhing away on the famous actor’s oversize mattress. Tops off? Check. Jewelry off? Check. Then off fly the undies, too, so hot!
And there before our lucky gal lies the utterly nude, quasi-sculpted bod of Mr. Fruzzy…
Whose endowment our darling sex-horned babe cannot wait to devour and jump on—and dine away she does, impressive, horny girl! Only problem is…Mr. Fruzzy’s private parts aren’t exactly responding in kind. Something’s wrong. Our sexed-out source wonders, Is it me? As she’s a knockout above all knockouts, highly unlikely.
Disappointed with the fun foreplay stuff, Fruzzy’s bed partner decides to just jump ahead to the main course, and go ahead and let daddy have his entrée right away, maybe he’s just not a nooky appetizer kinda guy? Just strictly a meat and potatoes dude maybe? So they assume the position. And, well, nothin’s happenin’ in that department, either.
Alas, Fruzzy just can’t get it up, and the amorous evening of promising love bites is a bust. Utterly depressed, our disappointed babe watches as Fruzzy, still naked, gets up and walk into his den, where he stays for some time. So she decides to follow him, wondering what’s up.
And guess who’s sitting at a computer Googling himself without a stitch on? Best part of all? Finally something had arisen—and it wasn’t just the poor girl’s irritation.
And It Ain’t: Bradley Cooper, Stephen Moyer, John Mayer
Mr. Tuna? hmm. Nick Lachey?
Nick is not a famous actor, he’s not fruzzy either. All the names end in -er. Gerard Butler and Adrien Grenier would fit more.
Someone who gets off off himself…hmm all of hollyweird?
Gerard Butler
soooo can see this being jen aniston and gerard butler when they “dated” but is he considered “very very famous”??
oooh – I like this guess!
lol ted us something else
Fruzzy Tuna-Stench?! Are these names he comes up with meant to be funny or a clue?
Adrien Grenier. The “Fruzzy Tuna Stench” refers to a very recent non-blind article where a recent conquest refers to his organ as “Hairy and smelly”.
Crap! Sorry, I forgot to include the link:
http://laragmag.com/hollywood-hook-up-adrian-greniers-hairy-butt.html
I know for a fact that Adrian reads just about EVERYTHING that is written about him online, so it wouldn’t surprise me that he’d be Googling himself.
Actually, it kind of would. I’d have thought he’d have a Google Alert sending stuff directly to his email.
jeremy piven
I don’t know why, but I am thinking George Clooney.
That was my first thought, too!
yup – c.l.o.o.n.e.y.
I’m with you. Georgie-boy was the first dude I thought of.
Jeremy Piven
Leo DiCaprio
Does “…that’s because they usually don’t tip each other off!” mean because people think he’s gay? What does that mean???
Maybe one lady doesn’t tip the other off, therefore causing problems? Just guessing…
I like the Jeremy “Pervert” Piven guess…. just reminds me of his sushi/mercury poisoning debacle.
This is not the first blind about Leo not being able to get it up/
Keanu Reeves? He’s looking kind of fuzzy/fruzzy and kind of homeless/tuna-stench lately? I remember reading he likes to ride down the hills behind the HOLLYWOOD sign on his bike (the blind says FTS lives in Hollywood Hills). But the “Jewelry Off? Check.” has me baffled. Would this guy wear alot of jewelry?
George Clooney? But it could be because he’s an older gentleman…or that he has been the subject of gay rumors.
I think the hints of NOT CoopER, MoyER, and MayER are essential. Maybe it is George Clooney! He was on ER. Is that too big of a gap for a connection to be made?
Oh! I totally forgot that Gerard last name was ButlER. Perhaps it is him…didn’t he say he was embarrassed to go back to the gym because he’s not in shape as he used to be? Maybe it’s a narcissistic thing.
Don’t you think the “er” at the end of all the hinted names points instead to Gerard Butler?
i go with Adrien GreniER too!
or someone else who’s name ends in ER.
Or something else that the 3 of them have in common. Mayer dated Jen Aniston and Cooper sort of dated her.
Does Butler have a home in the Hollywood Hills?
Ian somerhalder – he’s on a new vamp show, The Vampire Diaries, SM is in a vamp show and he usually has a light beard.
oh yeah, Ian and Bradley Cooper have the ABC connection too. I’m not sure about the John Mayer connection though.
Very very famous, quaisi sculpted and into himself – Simon Cowell.
ew.
L.O.L!!!
Totally Gerard ButlER. So sad. He has the Jennifer Anniston connection and like Moyer he’s a Brit who played a vampire.
But Gerard Butler isn’t “very, very famous” – although the Aniston link is there.
So there they are, the gorgeous brown-locked luscious one and her very, very famous bed partner,
it is not aniston she is not brown-locked
but i think it is gerard butler
there’s nothing in the blind to suggest that the woman is famous. i think it’s just the guy who is.
colin farrel, he notably likes to go down, “tuna stench”?
Did Leo take that new russian model of his to his hollywood home?
It’s Piven–Tuna is loaded with MERCURY.
Handsome enough in the first sentence rules out Piven right away.I’ll go with Grenier on this.
Piven. “Handsome enough” I would think means “well he’s not handsome, but he’s handsome enough“.
And he’s tuna smelly from all the sushi that gave him mercury poisoning!
amalgam8 for the win!
I think is George Clooney. Bradley Cooper’s photo is a hint since now he’s dating Renee Zelwegger who use to date GC
My first thought was Audrina and Chris Pine. They dated for a short time, she has brown hair, and seems like the type who would want to squeal about the conquest.
The girl is described as “a knockout above all knockouts”. Who’s a huge gorgeous dark haired star right now? Doesn’t have to be an actress or a star slut – could it be a model? How about Bar Refaeli?
She was with Leo for some time, who apparently has had this problem before, and seems to have an ego the size of a small African country. I could totally see this being him!
And Gisele before that….
Who is Chris Pine?
This blind has me cross eyed…Ted says girlfriends…so it’s a guy who actually dates the same woman more than once or twice…not a hit and run kind of guy…I think it’s Leo also…
I would have guessed GB too except for the “knock out above all knockouts” comment for which Jennifer Aniston is not.
This is not about Jen…the woman is not famous…..
there must be something in the “wanted to squeal, oh my!”….